Tuesday, 11 January 2011

Be Careful of What You Wish For

Each difficult situation in our lives is an opportunity to learn. We can choose to be beaten down by these times or use them to temper our metal in our personal trials by fire. I've always been beaten down to a certain extent, wallowed a little in my own misery, then somehow risen out of the ashes not so much a soaring phoenix, but at least a more determined, stronger, occasionally wiser, if a little battered version of me. I guess we can always choose the easy option and avoid our learning opportunities in preference to a smoother ride, but often life has a way of presenting the same obstacles in our path time and time again until we kind of get it.

Well anyway, my teacher told me recently that I would have to experience a certain type of challenging situation to walk further down the path I have chosen. I faltered at the thought of it, hesitant because this type of thing could cost me an easy life for a while, perhaps friendships, even though it was right for me to call the situation to me. Then I made up my mind, this was ultimately what I wanted and I had to trust, so I put it out to universe and called it in, what ever it turned out to be. I basically said go on then, bring it on.

Within two days the most almighty situation had blown up in exactly the way it was told I needed it to be to learn this one thing. It was a problem that had festered, but came to nothing for months and months and then within hours had escalated to one huge quagmire of people and fragile emotions. What followed was many, many sleepless nights, days and days of worrying and sorting, culminating in me making myself really ill and exhausted over it, then it was over.

I just hope that was it. I hope I handled it right. I hope I learned what I needed to learn and that there isn't more to come. Whatever I did or didn't learn though, I was sorely reminded of this ... be careful what you wish for, you just may get it by the bucket load!

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